How to ‘Calm Your Nervous System’ When Your Mind & Body Are Buzzing

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You know the feeling — body buzzing for no reason, racing thoughts, shoulders up by your ears.

Some people call it anxiety.
Some call it… a regular Tuesday.
In somatics, we call it 'activation.'

In these moments, you’d rather be anywhere but in your own skin. Your breathing likely feels shallow, and you're restless like you just can’t quite land. This is your stress response stuck in action mode.

And here’s the tricky part: we often don’t even realize we’re activated. In a fast paced world, it just feels normal to be “on,” scanning, planning, bracing.

How Your Stress Response Works

Your HPA axis (your brain–body stress pathway) always scanning your internal & external environments, and can flip you into a stress response without your conscious permission. This means changes in adrenaline, cortisol, blood sugar, & muscle tension that prepare you to respond to a threat.

Even internal stressors… whether it’s work uncertainty, internal conflict, relational tension, the weight of the world…they can be seen as a 'threat' by your body.

So we busy humans can spend long stretches in low-grade survival mode without even noticing or understanding why we feel unsettled and always 'on.'

Right now, as you’re reading this – just check:

• How is your breath moving?

• Are your jaw, chest, or brow tense?

• Do you feel anchored, or slightly lifted off yourself?
  

Somatics are never about fixing yourself or trying to force yourself relax. But we do have the ability to change states.

I’m going to share with you a super simple body based practice you can use right now to shift your state.

But first…

Let’s talk about The Myth of Being Calm.

Nervous system “regulation” is often misunderstood.

We glorify being calm… like if we’re not always peaceful and ‘regulated’, we’re failing at our healing process (sound familiar?).

But true nervous system regulation isn’t about calm, it’s about appropriate responsiveness. We actually need access to our different nervous system states.

For example... if a bear charges you, the correct regulated response is fight or flight, not meditating in the moss pretending you're zen.

But then why do we sometimes feel activated when we’re trying to sleep, talking to a friend, or sitting on the couch? When by all accounts we might feel safe enough to chill?

Because the nervous system is constantly scanning both your internal world and your external world.

It reads cues like:

Chronic Pain
Uncertainty in our lives & the world
Conflict in our lives & the world
Inflammation
Old emotional patterns
And outdated oppressive systems…

And all of that can send signals that say, “Something’s off,” even when life looks calm on the outside.

Life is happening, and we need our survival responses. This is why nervous system work isn’t about forcing calm. It’s about helping your body feel safe enough so you can nourish your system and build resilience to meet life’s challenges.

Today I'm going to share with you an exercise that helps drop into this felt sense of safety.

Understanding Your Vagus Nerve

Your vagus nerve is one of 12 cranial nerves: part of the main communication highway between your body and your brain.

These nerves run from your brainstem, down through your face, throat, heart, lungs, gut & pelvis — helping regulate breath, digestion, heart rate, emotional expression. They impact your sense of social safety and your capacity to feel present and connected. (And much, much more that's not within the scope of this article).

Your vagus nerve is the 10th cranial nerve. It doesn’t think in words — it speaks in sensations, breath, facial tone, and internal rhythm.

This is the system that lets you feel:

• “I'm okay.” or “I'm overwhelmed.”

• “I'm not safe.” or “I can breathe and soften here.”
  

When the vagus nerve is supported, you don't have to force calm.

Your body naturally settles when it senses safety, and you even feel more comfortable around other people.

The Ventral Vagal State

The ventral vagal state is your “safe & social” nervous system state.

It’s not just about feeling “relaxed,” it's relaxed and it’s connected. Engaged. Grounded. Alive.

In ventral vagal, you may notice:

• Fuller breath without trying

• Softer face and voice

• Ability to connect and make eye contact

• Curious mind instead of a bracing mind

• Feeling here (not in the past or future)
  

This is the felt sense of "I can meet this moment."

And it doesn’t mean life is easy or quiet… It means you have access to yourself and feel you can let your guard down a bit.

How to Calm Your Nervous System: The Basic Exercise

Credit: Stanley Rosenberg

This practice works through the oculocardiac reflex: a pathway between eye muscles and the vagus nerve that can shift the nervous system out of protection and into presence.

When to Use This Practice

• Before sleep or after waking
  

• When overwhelmed or overstimulated
  

• After conflict or emotional intensity
  

• Before entering a social setting or work call
  

• Anytime your mind feels loud and your body feels tight
  

What You Might Experience:

• An involuntary deep breath

• A swallow

• Yawning

• Softening in the face or throat

• Gentle wave of emotion

• Ground returning under you
  

This is not a relaxation trick! It’s an invitation back to ventral vagal presence - and each time you return to the ventral vagal state from a survival response, your resilience grows.

This helps activate the ventral vagal system — the part of your nervous system wired for safety, social connection, and grounded presence.

***Who it's not for:

This exercise involves moving your eyes and neck. It will likely exacerbate dizziness/vertigo if that is already something you struggle with. If that's the case, I've put a couple of alternatives at the end of this article for you to try!

How To Do The Basic Exercise

1. Sit or lie comfortably. If you like, you can interlace your hands behind your head.

2. Keep your head still and look to the right with just your eyes.

3. Hold until you feel a sigh, swallow, yawn, or spontaneous breath drop (usually 10–60 seconds).

4. Return eyes to center.

5. Repeat looking left.
   

Close your eyes and notice what happens inside of your body and mind as you shift states.

Why It Works

Your eyes connect directly to brainstem pathways that influence:

• Vagal tone

• Threat detection

• Breath + heart rhythm

• Tension patterns in the neck/face

• The HPA axis (stress cascade)

When your eyes soften and your breath drops naturally, your system registers: “There is no threat. We can come home now.”

No forcing.
No controlling.
Just allowing the body to complete a cycle it was already trying to resolve.

What You Might Notice

• Yawning

• Swallowing

• Spontaneous deeper breath

• Softening in jaw/face

• Tears or emotion thawing

• Quiet relief or subtle warm settling
  

You don't have to try hard for this...
you’re not trying to relax…
you’re letting the body shift itself.

Think of it as a reset button, not a “fix.”

Variations of The Basic Exercise

✅ For visually impaired bodies:
Turn head slightly left and right instead of moving the eyes.

✅ In bed:
Do it while lying on your back (keep your legs bent and feet planted) — a pillow is optional.

✅ Subtle version for when you’re in a social setting:
Turn your head all the way to look over your right shoulder, then look in the opposite direction with your eyes.

✅ For those with dizziness/vertigo or neck pain/instability:
Instead of moving your eyes, just let your eyes relax, allow your vision to soften, and your gaze to fall to the peripherals.

Final Reminder

One of the most important nuances of somatic work is that we don't rush or force you into calmness. So only use this exercise when it’s appropriate. (Not when there's a bear).

Because ‘regulation’ isn’t about becoming quiet or peaceful… it’s about becoming connected again to what’s here now and having the capacity to respond.

Try this exercise - what did you notice?

Andree

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